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UGHH, I'm such an IDIOT!

By June 16, 2005No Comments

Aiight. So the cruise was a BLAST!!! I have tons of funny stories about idiots everywhere including my cabin boy calling me drunk very early in the morning and a man chasing me in the bahamas b/c he thought my breasts were beautiful. So that’s a taste… the cruise went to Puerto Rico, St. Thomas, St. Maarten, and the Bahamas. I’ll break it up by location…

Puerto Rico: we docked at 2 and we took a bus to the rain forest. My whole family went on that excursion. We were on this crowded bus with this annoying as hell little brat in the front who I wanted to throw out the window. Her big, fat mom had no discipline for her so she continued to annoy everyone on the prolonged bus ride due to bad traffic. An hour and a half later we rolled up in the rain forest. It was beautiful and lived up to its name(yes, it was raining). We only got to stay there for 40 min but got to hike around and see a waterfall. I also had to hike up beside the waterfall and retrieve the crying brat I talked about earlier b/c her mother couldn’t make it. The whole bus ride back, the bus driver was fantasizing about food and pointing out every kmart and jcpenny on the way.

St. Thomas: ahhhh… so I did this excursion without any of my family and there were 8 other people. We took a ferry to the island of St. John to take an eco-hike. On the way there, the ferry driver was pointing out these huge houses owned by michael jordan, madonna, kenny chesney… rich bastards! St. John’s is 2/3 Caribbean National Forest and also a pretty small island. There is school up to middle school, but if the kids want to got to high school, they have to take a 45 min ferry ride in all sea conditions to St. Thomas. We arrived at St. John’s and there was this beef jerky vagrant guy standing there with torn up clothes and a walking stick. He was to be our guide and was a very strange individual. For example, he said, “That glop you put all over yourself to protect from the sun is damaging coral reefs. Never touched the stuff.” Well, obviously. We saw tons of hermit crabs, anols(lizards), a mongoose, and there are also wild donkeys on the island. The hike was lush and green, but it was a joke. We went to Honeymoon Beach…the 7th rated beach in the world rated by National Geographic. It was very nice until it started raining and we had to leave(after 40 min). After that we toured a sugar plantation/resort and took the ferry back to St. Thomas. As we were pulling up, the Kon Tiki Party boat was next to us manned with my brother ready to party by himself! (I went on that thing like 4 years has huge jugs of unlimited rum punch). I got off the ferry and some guy asked me if I wanted to go on the Kon Tiki for free. I was STARVING b/c I missed lunch, but who can turn down free rum punch? So I hopped on the boat…it was pretty fun. It took us to a beach to hang out for 45 min and then on the way back the party started. The bartender liked me so he was filling my cup halfway with rum and then adding spiked rum punch to it….so after a few of those and no food in my stomach, I was completely incoherent and barely made it back to the ship. these guys I met let me call Adam on their cell phone although i can hardly recall what I said to him. I took a shower and fell asleep in my towel on my bed until my brother came in and then I actually went to bed and slept 2 hours, managed to get up for dinner, left halfway through, and went BACK to bed for another hour to get up at 11PM to catch the nightlife on the cruise ship(no one goes to bed before 1). I was so hungover and didn’t drink for a few days after that.

I’ll write about the other two places tomorrow. I came back and my first time out on my mountain bike in a month, I had a bad wreck and almost broke my ribs except my hand broke my fall…so now I’m in a brace with a possibly fractured and badly sprained wrist so it kind of hurts to type. DAMN. I can’t seem to stay healthy… my knees also hurt from the damn exercise bike on the ship! I’m off to Europe next week for 3 weeks…. needless to say, I am not going to have much of a race season this year.

More tomorrow or later today…….(since I have SO much to do at work. I literally sit here every day with nothing to do except listen to the buzzing of the fluorescent lights and the soft hum of the computers slowly sucking the life out of me!) Pics MONDAY!

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